It’s Too Hot For…Part I?

25 Jun

So it’s been a while since I last wrote but of course there is good reason for the lack thereof.  It has been undeniably, painstakingly, unapologetically, flagrantly, the hottest summer of my life and what makes this worse, is that summer only just officially started.  The thought of doing anything in this heat produces sweat.  Sigh.  Anyways, enough about the heat, I mean, its not like it can get any wor….

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Oh.  Well this is awkward isn’t it?  Typically, I leave the discussion of social ills in the Bahamas to my cousin Andrew who is a contributing author for the 10th Year Seniors Crew and this is for what I deem to be two very good reasons.  At least one of our blogs had to have some tact and if you’ve ever had the opportunity to read “Friday’s with Drew”, you’ll quickly realize that there’s just a smidgen of that missing none.  Also, when people get offended (and trust me, they will) Andrew is like 6’4 and 300lbs of Bear muscle mixed with Tiger’s blood and hubris.  Considering I’m 5’10 (let me live), and about a buck 75, I have no problem letting him address these issues on my behalf after all, not all heroes wear capes.

Be that as it may, Andrew has been relatively busy with being nominated for an Icon Award for his Blog, blah, blah #bloggoals, blah, blah congrats or whatever…blah, blah give me some followers…blah,blah but seriously give me some followers.  As such, I have taken it upon myself to address some of the issues that I’m sure were on the back burner (heat pun intended).  And so, let us embark on this journey…bring a hat, some sunblock and a flashlight for the forthcoming shade.

It’s lunch time and you have one hour to leave work, grab lunch, get back to work, and eat it.  It is entirely too hot, for you to come into Subway or any made to order establishment and customize orders for thirty three coworkers.

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Actual Photo of an order when I was at Subway the other day.

I blame your coworkers (well and if you actually decided to take all of these orders I blame you as well). Did they honestly think Christine from Accounts could take thirty three orders by herself?  And no one thought to go and help?  What makes matters worse is there are always those coworkers with these specific ass orders written poorly on a crumpled yellow post it.

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Let me get a Foot-Long Steak & Cheese but cut off a 1/2 a foot cuz you know I can’t eat too much Bread…I bloat…American Cheese, 73 pieces of lettuce, 12 pieces of green pepper cut in 1/2 inch lengths, 1.378 ounces of mustard and three chocolate chip cookies with 12 chocolate chips in each one.

Poor Christine never had a chance.  And then they had the nerve to order drinks!  How is she supposed to take all this to the car?  Meanwhile the line be like:

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Just a little while longer…

I am trying to Eat Fresh, and Christine and her cohort of life ruiners won’t let me be great.  Don’t be Christine.

Meanwhile, let’s talk about “driving” in the Bahamas.  Air quotes are necessary because it isn’t so much driving but more about surviving.  Driving in the Bahamas is like playing Mario Kart without brakes and all the bananas and magic boxes.  First things first, I’m just going to rest this right here.

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Study it.  Print it.  Put it in your cars.  Hell…let’s call a town meeting.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.  The fact that Bahamians don’t know how to use roundabouts is both tragic and funny given the irony that you can’t go two lampposts without running into one.  It’s too hot to be getting into accidents especially given the long wait time you’ll have to endure waiting on the police to arrive.  And we all know how impatient Bahamians are when it comes to driving which brings me to my next point.  I know it’s hot.  Disgracefully so.  But if you honk at me when the light literally just turned green, I’ll move slower than molasses in mud.  #factsonly

Don’t even get me started on the poor excuse for parking I’ve seen throughout the country.

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Here’s a fun fact:  The white lines aren’t there for decoration.

You know what it really is too hot for though?  Bahamians and WhatsApp messages. Let’s start with the vary basics.  The name of the application is WhatsApp.  Not WhatsUp.  Notice the A versus the U and the different sounds they make.  Continuing on, how many times have we received a message like this?

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It’s really too hot for people to be telling me I’m doing the work of the devil and will go to hell for not forwarding this on to 10 people.  I have a funny feeling getting into Heaven has a little more to do with your own relationship with God and how you lived your life versus how many people you forwarded a text to.  Call me silly.

Also, WhatsApp is at its very core…a communication tool.  A way to speak with friends, families, business associates etc.  No reputable company is going to send out news that they are recalling a product on WhatsApp.  There’s this thing called the news that you might have heard about.  Also, while on the topic of circulating messages, no one wants to see images from the “really bad accident” or “crime scene”.  Not only is that disrespectful to the families that may have just lost a loved one, but it usually comes from those that have been entrusted to exercise judgement and to be confidential.

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Because the only way for Dasani to tell us Parasites are in the water is through a WhatsApp message… 

Also, enough with WhatsApp calls.  Now if you live in another country or you’re traveling, I totally understand the benefits of utilizing this feature but if you live in the same country and trying to call me over WhatsApp, it’s too hot for that.  Talking on the regular phone is hard enough as it is and you want to talk to me over a network that can’t even handle my regular phone calls?

I straight.  Call me from a landline.

Life’s a Beach.  Enjoy the waves….(cuz the sand is too hot).

 

 

The Islander: Powder, Paint & Purple Ink

19 May

 

The last two weeks haven’t been great for fingernails…unless you’re a nail technician.  Then you’ve made many dollars in the last two weeks.  Recently, the Bahamas experienced yet another Junkanoo Carnival and more importantly, depending on who you ask anyways, the country came together to vote in the General Election to determine who would be the government in power for the next five years.

I’ll be the first to tell you that my expectations for Bahamas Junkanoo Carnival this year were relatively low.  After a personally subpar to meh experience last year on the road, I had decided that my Carnival would simply consist of Jouvert and Suits.  Really and truly, I was also reminded of how much pain my body was in after going straight from Jouvert on the road.  Strike Two.  The third and final one came when it was announced that the date for Carnival would change as a result of the conflict that arose with the General Election.  There was an obvious uproar not only locally, but internationally as well as a result of airline tickets and hotel rooms being purchased by folks planning to attend.  The momentum that Junkanoo Carnival had picked up, quickly came to an abrupt halt.

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A reenactment of when the momentum was lost.

After a few tense days and tons of ridicule on the Twittersphere, the date was reverted to it’s original date.  Then in a random twist of fate, the fortunes changed and God smiled down upon us.  It was announced that both Machel Montano and Bunji Garlin would be performing.

For the uninitiated, Machel Montano and Bunji Garlin might arguably be the two greatest soca artists currently in the industry.  Yes.  This is my opinion…if your opinion  varies feel free to create a blog and express your views there…or the comments section below, whichever is easier for you.  Be that as it may, both artists offer different styles and they recently hashed out a disagreement, which led to them collaborating for the first time.  Much to the delight of their fans…i.e. Me.   While I hadn’t planned on going to the concert, my position on that matter quickly changed…obviously.

And then there was the matter of Suits.  Those that have been following my blog post know how I felt about that party and after last year, I figured there was no plausible way that they could top it.  I would soon realize just how wrong I was.

First things first however…the concert.  From years past, we understood the mission and task at hand.  After being held hostage at the inaugural event two years prior (you know who you are), we decided that the best time to get to the concert would be midnight.  A veteran (feteran) decision that would greatly benefit our legs and feet.  After catching up with friends that I hadn’t seen in a while and eating a million chicken wings – much needed energy for the dancing that was sure to come, we headed to the concert area.

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Keilya’s Snapchat and she’s no where to be found.  Typical.

Now here is where the fun began.  While watching the news earlier, I had heard there was rain heading our way.  It just so happens that it decided it was now an appropriate time to rain.  While most were drawn away, my group of friends and I have extensive experience partying in the rain and in wet environments…we were in our element.

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Shout out the Lighting folks for the Glow.  

We also saw this as an opportunity to move up closer to the stage.  The performances did not leave us lacking and made up for me not seeing Machel last year due to someone who shall again, remain nameless.

As for Suits, with libations, friends and GoPro in tow, we set out on the high seas in search of an experience.  There were familiar faces, there were some new ones, but the vibe was reminiscent of yesteryear.  First came the water.  This was different this year…saltwater…while it was nice to have the water rain down on us, I did get blasted in the face on more than one occasion.  I’m also 99.998% certain I drank some of it.  Please note this was a minor annoyance and did not, I repeat did not, detract from the fun.  Next came the powder and bright colours filled the air.  It was happening again.  This feeling of joy…mixed with salt water.

Just when I thought it couldn’t get any better…well it did.  The DJ makes an announcement stating that Machel was on the boat next to us.  I was like yeah, okay.  A few minutes later he tells the crowd to wave to Machel…I still didn’t believe him but just to be sure, I took a walk over to the edge of the boat.  Lo and behold it was true.  What happened over the next few minutes was crazy.  Machel’s boat, pulled up next to our boat, they threw him a wireless microphone and he gave an impromptu performance.  The setting was amazing.  On a boat on the magnificent waters of the Bahamas, chasing a setting sun, while listening to the hypnotizing beats of soca.  Paradise.  This experience is fleeting, because as soon as I knew it, we were back on the dock heading home.  Another epic event.

On a more serious note, later on in the week, the General Election was held and now we have a new government.  It was actually the first time that I voted.  Not a word from any of you.  Yes I realize that I’m almost 30 (God that sounds weird).  In a way, I’m happy that I didn’t vote until now.  Only recently (within the past few years), have I really paid close attention to what has been happening in the country.  If I had voted in years prior it would have been a vote from an uneducated stance.  I didn’t know the parties, the candidates, their various stances on varying issues.  Some of it I blame on youth (I know not an excuse) and just a general nonchalance but with age and wisdom comes greater responsibility…for some of us anyways.

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The Bahamian way of protecting against Voter Fraud.  How 1938 of us.

The day I voted, I felt a grand sense of patriotism.  While the Bahamas has come a long way in the last 43 years, we still have a long way to go.  In a world that’s evolving daily and changing rapidly, I hope that we can continue to make head way in all areas and to show what a great country this place really  is.  I see so much opportunity in Bahamians  and in the Bahamas.  After reading so many newspapers about the various issues, the differences between the parties etc. I think it would be remiss of me not to make one statement and it’s not anything groundbreaking or profound (although I have been known to deliver some dumbly profound ones).  Quite the opposite in fact and something that we’ve probably all heard before.  Be the change that you want to see.  It serves no purpose to complain about something if you’re not willing to act on it.

If you remember nothing else from this post, please remember those last two lines.  While I appreciate a well told story and a good party, I would appreciate even more to see our little country move forward.

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Sunset on The Dock.

Life’s a Beach and sometimes a dock.  Either way, enjoy the waves.

 

The Islander: Volume 7

30 Apr
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View of the Atlantic Ocean at Pete’s Pub.  

Day 55.  Aside from the initial slowness I mentioned in my first blog, things are progressing relatively well.  I find myself slowly acclimatizing to life on my own and have come to a few different realizations.  I’ve realized that in my quest to not starve to death and to not eat cereal multiple times a day, I should teach myself to cook.  My cooking skills are evolving at an exponential rate.

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Oh…while on the topic of food, I’ve also realized that the folks at Fyre Fest, Nochella (whichever you prefer), have varying opinions of “gourmet”.  And you thought we weren’t going to broach that topic.  One of my friends, who shall remain nameless…

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I never said he’d remain faceless….

tried to coax a group of us to go.  For multiple reasons, we declined the request.  But I digress.

I’ve also realized how important quality time is since I’ve moved.  Once you move to another place, you no longer have that luxury of just doing things with friends and family at will, and so you appreciate the time that you do spend together or talk.  One of the persons I speak to with regularity is my dad.

People say that I look exactly like my dad and that we share the same mannerisms etc.  It’s so bad that I walk into places sometimes and people tell me who my father is before I even get a chance to introduce myself.  My dad is responsible for my love of everything aviation.  He would take me to the airport as a young kid and we’d sit right under the approach path for hours watching airplanes land and takeoff.  My mom hated this as she always thought the airplanes would land on top of us but for me, this was exhilarating.  We also would go out on Sundays and fly model airplanes…a practice he still engages in to this day.

My dad is also a character.  He’s funny…but what makes him funny is the fact that he’s dead serious with whatever he’s saying.  For example, about 20 years ago, we were all in the house with the exception being my mother whom was in the backyard gardening when we all heard a loud shriek.  My mother ran inside and stated to my father that there was a snake on the patio outside.  In not so many words and a few expletives that I will spare you from reading on a Sunday, he got the hint that it was his duty to rid the world of this reptile.

This snake was no regular snake however.  The snake must have seen my dad coming with the cutlass and escaped into a crack in the patio.  Now I like to think that I’m fairly smart and reasonable.  Qualities I must get from my mother because my father had the ingenious idea of pouring gas into the crack and lighting a match to place in the crack to kill the snake.

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 I couldn’t make this up if I tried.  In some kind of National Geographic documentary where mother lions protect their cubs from prey, one minute I was there as a kid thinking to myself that this was a terrible idea, the next I was in my mother’s arms watching the house get smaller as we ran away from the house.  We waited for a boom that never came.  Clearly the original fyre festival would have been right on Sapphire Ridge.

There are tons of honorable mentions too.  Last year I called my father to wish him Happy Birthday.  He responded “It’s today?”  Just this morning, he told me he’d call me back because church was going in at 10:00AM.  Never mind the fact that it was 10:11AM.  There were somber moments as well.  I remember when our house flooded and we had water up to my parent’s waist in the house.  That night, I climbed on my dad’s back to get out of the house because the water level was too high for me to stand.  This was obviously after I secured my most prized possession of course:  my Sega Genesis.  Months later, my dad would give me bad advice that would lead to that very Sega blowing up.  I plugged it into an outlet that had a higher voltage than the other outlets which led to my Sega shorting out…I remember the pop and faint burning smell to this day.

This is what I’m up against.  While we have had our share of disagreements over the years, there have been more good times than bad ones.  Christmas was always a fun time in the house.  My dad is a big proponent of science (which is why the whole gasoline and fire thing still perplexes me to this day) and he’d always get toys that made me think.  One time he bought me a robot that I had to assemble.  To this day it still works.  He’s always been a supportive father, always reminding me to push myself further and to make the best of the hand I’ve been dealt.  What else could you really ask for?  Well…aside from a fire extinguisher.

Life’s a Beach.  Enjoy the wave.

 

The Islander: Volume 6.5

25 Apr

Call me Drake…without the singing, the pale complexion, and questionable tattoos because I just went Back to Back.  Two blogs in two days.

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Wait but seriously though.  Sooooo…we aren’t going to talk about the fact that he has   a flower and a bee tattooed on his arm?  I mean if y’all good I’m good…I just thought we should have addressed it…we’re getting off topic aren’t we?

About two weeks ago was the Easter Holiday.  With one of my best friends, God Son, and adopted family in tow, we headed up to Crown Haven which is the northern most point on the island.

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There.  I included a map because I know some of you guys still don’t know where Abaco is much less a tiny settlement on the Northern tip of the island.  Away we went.  The drive itself is quite long…for being on an island anyways.  With stops along the way, we set off to explore the unknown.

First stop was Treasure Cay.  For those of you that follow me on social media, you would have seen me post this beach a few times.  The backdrop is simply breathtaking.  Neon blue waters, powdery white sand and cloudless skies are a reoccurring theme here.  It’s no wonder that this area is ripe with second home owners.

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Yeah, I know.  My words are inadequate.  After a few minutes of relaxing and people watching, we continued our trek northward.  The drive itself isn’t the most inspiring as you continually pass millions of pine forest on either side of the road.  What is amazing though are the settlements that spring up almost out of nowhere.

These settlements have the bare necessities and it is this that most out-islands (or family islands commonly referred to by Bahamians) are known for.  For the most part, the settlements shared similar amenities.  Each one had a small convenience store selling sundry items, a few local mom and pop gas stations, a church, and that was about it outside of homes.  The homes themselves were very modest and quaint…but you could tell that each settlement had it’s own unique character. For them, life is relatively simple.  It wasn’t uncommon to see most people outside talking with each other, and most were kind and waved.  The settlements are relatively small so everyone knows when you’re the new person in town so to speak.

As we drifted further North, here is where the real fun began.  Imagine this.  Myself as the only male (outside of my two year old Godson) and three females in my car.  We are finally approaching the northern most tip of the island when in the middle of the road there are about five men and one person whom I believe to be a lady.  We still aren’t sure about her (him) but that’s not important to this story.  One of the guys has an empty bottle of rum in his hand and waves it menacingly towards another gentleman that has a rock (that looks like it’s straight from Bedrock that Fred Flintstone lent to him) in his hand to defend himself while another gentleman (who is armed with nothing) is trying to stop the impending doom that is about to occur.  It quickly becomes abundantly clear that all of these men probably are just a tad bit inebriated.  The lady? is screaming at the top of his/her lungs that they shouldn’t fight while the other two gentlemen across the road suddenly begin jawing at one another.  One picks the other up and looks like he’s about to practice the latest wrestling move he saw on WWF when he decides to let him go.  I was torn between turning around (which would have sucked because we just drove for two years) and driving through (because I didn’t want Jhene (my car) anyone to get injured).  Alas, we strolled through and made it all the way north.

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This far north, there is actually a ferry service that runs between Abaco and Grand Bahama.  The town itself appears to be a fishing community which allows those living in the area to be able to provide for their families.  As much as I say that Marsh Harbour is slow, these areas are even slower but in a weird way, it was enjoyable to see this side of the island.  People were friendly and engaging.  Kids were outside playing and socializing and not on iPads.  Weird.

The next day I got a chance to head south and go to Pete’s Pub to watch the sunset.  For the uninitiated, Pete’s Pub is a restaurant and bar overlooking a bay that offers iconic views.   While off the beaten path, the views that we were afforded were amazing.  Learning from my earlier mistake of trying to set the scene with my words, I’ll let the photos do the talking.

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With the weekend coming to a close, it was nice to spend a nice afternoon with whom I consider to be extended family and watch the sunset.  Abaco certainly has a charm to it and whether you like it or not, it grows on you.

Life’s a beach.  Enjoy the waves.

P.S.  There may be a video to follow in the coming days. 🙂

The Islander: Volume 6

24 Apr

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So… I missed a week.  Don’t get mad.  Look, I even put a pretty scenic picture up to make up for it.  It’s been a rather hectic two weeks for me and while I’ve been meaning to write, I just hadn’t found the time.  But fear not, I have lots to share so let’s start with my most recent weekend and I will work my way backwards in the next post later on this week.

With one of my best friends turning 30 and celebrating by throwing a party that I was invited to told I would die if I didn’t attend, I took the opportunity to head home for the weekend and to catch up with friends and family that I hadn’t seen in awhile.  Cause, you know, more life and what not.

As soon I touched down into Nassau on Friday afternoon, I hadn’t realized how much I had missed home.  Obviously you miss family and friends and the ability to do certain things sometimes, but in some way I guess I had blocked it all out since I had moved. While I’ve been in Marsh Harbour, there are certain people I feel like I know because I see them everywhere.  But this was different…Nassau was so busy!   I almost felt like I was in New York City.  There was traffic…people I hadn’t seen before…it was magical.  There was even more than one street light that I had to stop to.  I hadn’t realized how acclimatized I had gotten to the slowness in Abaco.  Everyone here seemed to be in a rush.

For those of you that don’t know, it’s also election time in the Bahamas which means….

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Sidewalks!!!!!!  You get a sidewalk!  She gets a sidewalk!  Everyone gets a Sidewalk!!!!!

Oh.  Also signs.  Sidewalks, signs, and stripes (road striping).  Not like we wanted to hear about how the parties are going to rid the country of social ills, bring jobs to the economy or anything like that.  We just want some where to run safely clearly.  I digress.  I was happy to be home.  I also caught up with a few strangers during my trip home.

 

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Exhibit A

I hadn’t seen my mom since February due to conflicting travel schedules so I was happy to see her and to spend some time with her.  It was also good to know that she would still make breakfast and do my laundry occasionally.  I was getting concerned that she’d forget or even worse…just not want to do it anymore.  The horror of that thought.  I’m kidding…sort of?  It was nice having a familiar voice around.  She even found time to do that Mom thing where they tell you that you should do something a certain way, you disagree, and then they keep reminding you to do it in random conversation until you give in and just do it.  An Example from yesteryear:

Mom: “Hey I had dinner at this amazing restaurant last night.”

Me: “What’s it called?”

Mom: “Luciano’s.  They had this band playing called Clean your room and wash the car…really cool guys.”

You get the gist.  The rest of the weekend felt like a blur as I caught up with friends and family that I hadn’t seen in awhile.  It was a great feeling just to be able to relax among familiar faces where you aren’t the stranger.  I was also happy that I decided to extend my stay in Nassau an extra day.  With the weather slated to be bad in Nassau and Marsh Harbour, I was in no rush to drown while trying to enplane/deplane.

All too quickly, I was back in the airport heading back to Marsh Harbour.  As much as I enjoy living here, it definitely has made me appreciate home.  As much as I appreciate home however, I’ve taken the stance that home is where my suitcase is and for the time being, that’s here in Abaco.

P.S.  My food processor arrived.  I’ll take a picture in the next post and introduce you guys.  I’m also trying to come up with a name for her so I’d appreciate any opinions.  I have used it and decided to make Jerk Chicken the other day.  I surprised myself.  It was really good…like I would have paid for it.  If this whole aviation thing doesn’t work out…nah…who am I kidding?

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Life’s a beach.  Enjoy the wave.

 

 

The Islander: Volume 5

9 Apr

And so, here we are, Day 35.  April 6th has made one month since my move and as cliché as this is about to sound, time flies.  I was having a conversation with a good friend late last week and we got on the topic of my move.  “What has been the biggest transition for you since you’ve moved?” was the question that was posed.

Now, having lived with my mother since I’ve moved back home, the answers to this question were limitless.  I wouldn’t say that I’m spoiled per se…nope.  I am.  Let’s just keep it moving  Rotten might I add.  Happy?  And for my friends from afar whose parents kicked them out at 18 to turn their rooms into dens/yoga rooms etc., it’s a cultural thing here in the Caribbean for you to live with your parents late into your twenties and or early thirties.

But we are getting off topic.  There are obviously certain things about home you miss but by far the biggest thing I’ve had to get accustomed to, was cooking for myself.  Now let me be the first to tell you, in my mind I’m the chocolate Bobby Flay.  Mainly because of Chopped and Iron Chef.  I remember one time I was home alone and my cousin called me and asked what I was doing.  I responded “cooking”.  When she queried as to what I was cooking, I stated (matter of factly) “A pureed peanut spread with a grape relish reduction on a toasted brioche bun.”  The phone went quiet.  Fine.  I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

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Don’t you lie to me Sally!

I figured if the guys on Iron Chef could make up fancy names for the things they were making, I may as well join the party before it’s too late.  Oh well.  In reality however, I’m neither a great nor terrible cook.  It’s always something I’ve wanted to master.  I don’t know what the allure is but I’ve always been intrigued by great chefs and their ability to combine one off ingredients into culinary masterpieces.  I’ve been fortunate to eat great food all over the world which leaves me in my current conundrum.  I love great food…but I’m not a great cook.  Oh what a tangled web we weave.

In any event, coming home at the end of a long day of work and having to cook is not my initially, was not my idea of a good time.  Especially when your mom typically had already thought this through for you.  Sidebar, she had an uncanny sixth sense to always know what I wanted, and prepare it, before I even wanted it.  It quickly dawned on me however, that unless I wanted to eat cereal every night (nothing against it might I add…I’m a firm believer of breakfast at any time during the day…actually I believe you can eat anything at any time of the day), that I should probably get in the kitchen and learn/hone my cooking skills.  No time like the present.

So far, so good as a matter of fact.  I’ve been experimenting in the kitchen and things are actually turning out relatively well.  My apartment is still standing for starters and anytime I can cook a meal and not burn down my residence (or burn an appendage for that matter), I consider it a success.  Small mercies really.  These past two days in particular, I’ve actually surprised myself.  I’ll let the photos do the talking.

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Steak, onions, mushrooms – Notice the translucency of the onions bringing out the sweetness..I don’t know.  I heard Guy Fieri say it.

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Well you’ve heard of Steak A La Frittes….Steak A La Grits.  Clever with the Word Play aren’t I?

See…it looks edible.  And if it’s one thing that Chopped taught me is, it has to at least look good.  I’ve been experimenting with different recipes and actually just bought myself a food processor.  God.  I don’t know what’s worse.  The fact that I bought a food processor or the fact that I’m actually excited about it.  Isn’t it amazing how over time things change?  By no means am I pro, so please feel free to share your favorite recipes.  I’d be happy to try them out.

In the mean time, Life’s a beach.  Ride the wave…but don’t over-salt

The Islander: Volume 4 (Turn Your Lights Down Low)

2 Apr

Photo Mar 18, 3 15 38 PM

In 1981, long before I was born, sat a much younger Phil Collins.  He was penning what would become one of the most timeless songs this generation would ever see.  When interviewed about “In the Air Tonight”, Collins said that he wasn’t entirely sure what it was about, having wrote it in frustration and hurt after divorcing his first wife.  I’m here to tell you that while that may be true, he’s not fooling me, I know exactly what it’s about.

The song is about BEC.  That’s right.  This song is about the Bahamas Electric Company or Bahamas Power & Light.  Whatever their name is.  To the foreigners, BEC is the company in charge for keeping the lights on and believe you me, I use the term ‘keeping the lights on’ very loosely, but back to the lyrics and the obvious BEC/Phil Collins connection.

The way I see it, Phil lived in the Bahamas and was fed up with the lights going out so frequently.  Hell.  That may have even lead to his divorce.  Trust me, in the middle of summer, when it’s two hundred and thirty seventeen degrees in the shade, you don’t even want yourself touching yourself, much less a significant other.  But listen to the words of the song.  “I can feel it coming in the air tonight.”  Anyone that has ever experienced a BEC blackout, prior to the lights going out, there’s a feeling that overcomes you.  A sixth sense or premonition if you will.  You just know they about to do garbage.  Tell me I lie.  Of course there are those times when BEC catches you completely off guard as well, and you feel betrayed but those are few and far between.

Now I see the skepticism in your eyes.   You’re probably asking “Why does Phil keep saying ‘Oh Lord’…what does that have to do with BEC? ” Well, he keeps saying that every few lines to remind you of the heat he is experiencing as a result of the lack of electricity.  Clearly, the Lord is the only one that can help him.

He goes on to sing, “I been waiting for this moment, for all my life.”  If you listen, you can really hear the passion in his voice especially as it is the last major line of the song.  He’s obviously referring to that moment when the electricity gets turned back on.  The passion he’s exuding is his over elation at the fact that he has electricity again.  Take em’ to church Jonathan.

Since I moved to Abaco, I’ve been seeing all of these generators at business establishments which isn’t uncommon at all.  What has struck me was the number of them in residential areas.  Now coming from Nassau, I was fully aware that this wasn’t a sheer coincidence nor was the generator company having a blow out sale.  This wasn’t a good omen.  And so, since I’ve been here, I’ve just been waiting for that moment to happen.  Waiting.  It’s like when you were a kid and slapped a friend, and they told you they were going to get you back but you didn’t know when, so you’re there telling them to hit you right then.

Don’t get me wrong, there were a few close calls.  The lights cut off in the food store.  I’d come home to see the clock needing to be reset on the stove.  They were toying with my emotions.  And then two nights ago, it happened.  At 2:41AM no less.  When BEC cuts the lights off, there is an instant heat associated with the electricity going off ergo me knowing the exact time.  Luckily for me, I had been preparing for this very moment.  Like Phil, I felt it coming.  In a weird fit of luck, I cut the temperature down that day a few degrees.  Little did i know that later on that evening, this stroke of genius would save my life.

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I decided to take a selfie during the blackout.

Jonathan 1, BEC/BPL 0.  While I may have won the battle, the war rages on.  With the summer fast approaching, something tells me that this isn’t the last of them.

Life’s a beach.  Enjoy the wave.  (Also just saying that they could probably use waves to make steady electric energy but…well never mind.)