My Life: A Series of Unfortunate Events

10 Feb


To borrow a line from singer Bobby Caldwell, “I guess you’ve wondered where I’ve been?”  It’s been a while, and to be honest, I’ve missed you guys…all 9 of you.  Oh, while we’re on the topic of Bobby Caldwell (his major song was What You Won’t Do For Love – ) and since we’re in February (also known as Black History Month), I’m going to drop some knowledge on you guys right quick.  He’s not black.  Just let that sink in for a minute and don’t worry, I’ll wait while you google his name and search images.  Yep.  I had the same face.  Where did he get all that soul from?!  My guess is he had a black lover.  In any event, it’s time to move on…and yes, when you google his name again later, he’ll still be white.  This is the only time I’ve ever thought Google made a mistake.

Now then, let’s cut to the chase shall we?  So by now you’re probably asking yourself, what’s the reason for the title….and is Bobby Caldwell really white??  First and foremost, the answer to the latter is yes. As for the former, I’m starting to believe I’m bad luck.  We all know Murphy’s Law, Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong and this becomes increasingly true when I’m present.  Initially, I didn’t believe this and chalked it up to coincidence.  That was until one day, the CEO of the company made a comment.  “Jonathan, I hope we don’t have any emergencies today!” she said.  “Why would we?” I retorted.  “You’re to work, every time you come to work something bad happens.” after which, she began to list a series of events.  I was the common denominator in all of them.

Now for the last 27 years, I’ve had my fair share of, well interesting stories but to be called a jinx, well, I wasn’t going to have it.  That is until my most recent trip this past week.  I headed out to San Jose, California for a conference.  My flights looked something like this: Depart Nassau, stop in Miami, stop in Chicago, arrive in San Jose.  On the return, Depart San Jose, stop in LA, stop in Miami, Arrive in Nassau.  Seems easy enough right?  Well, two days before my departure, I’m flipping through the channels when I see the headlines, “Chicago Braces For Massive Winter Snowstorm.” Hundreds of flights to be canceled, roads to be closed but luckily, the storm was to slam the area the day before my arrival.  The day of my flight, I checked my flights and everything was showing on time.  Ha! My flights were on time and smooth.  I laughed in Murphy’s face.  Jonathan – 1, Murphy – 0.

Welcome to Snowy Chicago!

Welcome to Snowy Chicago!


Well apparently, that wasn’t appreciated and he would have his sweet revenge.  On the morning of my flight, all my flights showed they were on time and I was looking forward to getting back home.  Especially since I had to be to work the next morning for 7AM.  I got to the airport at 8AM for my 10AM flight and then the fun began.  About 30 minutes before my flight, a message comes through on my phone saying that my flight was cancelled.  Perfect.  For those of you not seeing why this is a problem, this means I would have missed both my connection in L.A and in Miami and would not be back in Nassau that night.  This also meant I would have missed work the next morning.  After waiting for half an hour due to the long line, I went up to see the agent at the desk who informed me of my options: I could either take the red-eye to Miami later on that evening out of LA or if I could get to San Francisco, I could still get to Miami by 8:30PM, and make my 9:30PM flight to Nassau.  Obviously, it was clear which option I was leaning towards.  But of course, there was a catch…and I guess what fun would it be if there wasn’t one?  That flight left San Francisco at 12:10PM.  At this moment, it was 10:10AM and San Fran is an hour away.  They would arrange for me to take a shuttle down there but there was still lots to do. I still had to retrieve my checked bags, get on the bus, check-in my bag, clear security and get to my gate before 12:10PM.

Enter Kumar, the shuttle driver tasked with getting me to SFO before my flight left me.  At 10:22AM, Kumar and I set off for San Fran.  Kumar said it would be tight but as long as we didn’t hit traffic, I should get there in enough time.  As soon as we got on the highway, there was traffic.  Luckily this passed by pretty quickly and with God on our side, I got to San Fran by 10:55AM.  I ran to check-in and the agent took my passport and boarding ticket so that he could check my bags in.  He made a face.  I knew I was about to receive another blow.  So remember how the whole reason for me (Usain) bolting to San Francisco was so I could make my 9:30 flight out of Miami to Nassau?  Yeah this flight was delayed by an hour thus pushing our arrival time into Miami to 9:42PM.  12 minutes after my flight to Nassau was scheduled to depart.  Murphy was smiling slyly.  The agent told me that the airline would be putting me up in a hotel and that I would just need to see an agent upon landing in Miami.  Once I got on the airplane, in the back of my mind I was still hoping that I would make my connection…that was until the pilot got on the intercom and stated that due to a ground hold, it would be another half hour before we would be allowed to push back from the gate.  Murphy didn’t have time for me or my hope.  For those of you not keeping score, Murphy-5, Jonathan-1.

Waiting in San Francisco and watching all the other planes leave on time. :(

Waiting in San Francisco and watching all the other planes leave on time. 😦

Finally we were allowed to leave and after five hours and four minutes of flying, I was in Miami.  Local time: does it really matter?  It was after my flight left for Nassau.  I sauntered over to an agent who informed me that I wasn’t eligible for a hotel room.  Should I have been surprised?  I asked her to check again as the agent in San Francisco told me I would be, and a few minutes later, I was in luck.  Hotel voucher in hand, I made my way to my hotel and arrived just before or after (I don’t remember it was a long day) midnight.  My new flight was scheduled to leave for Nassau at 7:20AM which meant a wake up call of 4AM to be to the airport for 5AM.  Oh joy.

Apparently while I was sleeping, Miami decided to freeze over.  It was cold and I didn’t find this out until it was time to board the shuttle back to the airport.  I didn’t realize that my lack of wearing a sweater would become an issue until later.  I forged on and check-in was uneventful.  They called my flight for boarding and we walked out to the plane however we weren’t allowed to board.  Think 60 people outside of an airplane in the cold and that’s what this scene was like.  After ten minutes of sub-zero temperatures (really it was like 60 degrees but I didn’t have a sweater!), we were informed that maintenance was on-board the airplane and that we would have to return to the gate until they could rectify the issue.  I could only smile.  One lady asked me about my travels and after telling her of my plight, decided to tell me that it was my fault we were delayed now.  I cursed her under my breath and made a mental note to trip her down if the opportunity presented itself.  A few minutes later, we boarded and a quick 38 minutes later, I was in Nassau.  Tired, jet-lagged and an hour and a half late for work, but I had made it nonetheless.  With the time conversion, 24 hours earlier I was leaving to go to the airport in San Jose before my adventure began.  As time goes on, I’m learning to dance in the rain.  Murphy may have won the battle, but the war rages on.

Finally home.

Finally home.

2 Responses to “My Life: A Series of Unfortunate Events”

  1. traceyraimondo February 10, 2015 at 4:37 pm #

    What an awesome writer you are!! I guess you must have gotten it from your big sis! 🙂 I thoroughly enjoyed this post!

  2. Bahamianista April 28, 2015 at 11:49 pm #

    Great blog! Your entries are so interesting!

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