15 May


May 15th, 2016 is the date.  It’s been one week exactly.  Since then, life hasn’t been the same.  You see, this past weekend, Nassau was home to the second installment of Junkanoo Carnival.  For the uninitiated, Junkanoo Carnival is the marriage of local Bahamian Junkanoo, and Carnival which is held in various islands throughout the Caribbean.  Personally, I believe that the two events should remain separate but we can argue that point later.  In my eyes,  the highlight of this weekend was never going to be the road march, but rather, a small event happening on Mother’s Day.  And it was the mother of all events.  You see what I did there?  The play on words?  Nifty right?

In the months leading up to Junkanoo Carnival, my feelings toward it could best be described as “meh”.  Maybe it was gas.  Maybe it was the fact that I recently returned from Trinidad Carnival and knew that replicating the epicness that was this year’s carnival would be impossible.  Maybe it was the fact that the powers at be decided that Wyclef Jean and Destra Garcia should headline this year’s concert.  Let’s put some perspec on it. Wyclef has never written, produced, sang, or remixed one soca song in his entire life (that I know of anyways). Destra on the other hand is a soca artiste, but 99.9586 carry the three % percent of Bahamians only know her hit song Lucy.  Never mind the fact that she’s in the country every other week performing anyways.  Never mind the fact that 89.2% of you can’t name more than four of her songs since 2013.  Don’t worry.  I’ll wait.  I just felt like they could have given some other artists a chance.  But I digress.  Whether it was one of those items, or some ghastly combination of the three, whatever it was, I wasn’t excited.


Real recognize real.  Gilligan knows how I felt.

I felt that way right up until I had a conversation with one of my friends.  Enter Crista. Friend, blogger and feteran. *insert shameless plug* – www.bahamianista.com – do i need to tell you to follow her as well?  We were comparing parties and she told me that she had already purchased tickets for Suits.  How could I forget?!  This party encompassed everything that I love.   Boats ✓, Day drinking ✓✓,  and you guessed it, Day drinking on boats ✓✓✓.  I had heard marvelous things about the party from the prior year from both local and international partygoers.  There would be no such misfortunes this year.  My ticket was booked immediately.


Me after getting my ticket.

While I was elated, the feeling wasn’t mutual amongst my friends when they were prompted to tag along.  The common complaints went a little something like this. “It’s Mother’s Day.” “My mother would kill me.” “I have work the next day.” “I was going to watch/listen to Lemonade that day while reorganizing my closet and wrap the coins on my dresser.”  I was over it.  But as the date drew near, each of them came to their senses and bought their tickets.

The week before the party, is when things got interesting.  The party was already labeled to be a cooler fete on a boat.  A cooler fete is a party where party goers bring their own coolers  full of libations.  They’re typically on land so I was already a bit curious to see how it would play out on a boat, but here is where things got interesting.  A notification from Facebook pops up on my phone.  It’s SUITS, telling me that not only is it a cooler fete, on a boat, but it’s a jouvert cooler fete…on a boat.  This was exotic, this was ambitious, this was…unheard of.  Before I could message Crista, she messaged me.  While I don’t remember the  exact conversation, I’m fairly certain it went something like “Bey you see this shit?”.  We had so many questions.  Would they be able to pull it off?  When is Bahamar going to open?  What were we going to wear?  One thing was for certain though, there was an unmistakable buzz surrounding this party now.  The question was, would they be able to live up to the hype?


The post that changed the world.

The day had finally arrived.  I didn’t want to miss a beat.  With my cooler and crew intact, we came to party like Dyson Knight (another shameless plug).  First impressions were positive.  Prior to entering a party in Nassau, I always take a glance around to figure out what kind of day/night I’m in for.  Will I need first aid?  Luckily, I believe the party hit the perfect medium in terms of price point and dates.    While half of Nassau was out treating their mothers to Poop Deck or some buffet over to Atlantis, here we were.  The chosen ones.  I was pleasantly surprised to see such an eclectic crowd. If I had to hazard a guess and break it down into percentages, it was the perfect mix of 48% stushness, 50% alcoholics, and 2% junglass (not your over the hill junglass girls mind you, more so the private school ones who just know how to have fun).  The percentages were forever in my favor.

Once  onboard the SeaWind, everyone congregated under the covered section of the boat.  Why?   Because to take a line from Kerwin Du Bois, the sun here in Nassau is “too real, it’s dangerous.”  And I’m dark enough as it is, so let me hold on to this colour for at least another few weeks.  Summer is near.  The vibes were instantaneous.  As the drinks began to flow, the DJ had everyone rocking to the conscious tunes.  The calm before the storm if you will.  As we left the harbour, the congregation shifted to the open area.  What happens next, is what dreams are made of.


Now for my seasoned partiers, I’m sure while your reveling/feting/partying you experience a paradigm shift.  For me, this occurs for me when I’ve had x number of drinks (varies based on wind direction, atmospheric pressure and how much food I’ve eaten) and my inhibitions basically get tossed out to sea.  It just so happened that I was on a boat so this happened a lot faster than I anticipated although, the three Kalik Light Platinum beers that I consumed in the parking lot (in a 15 minute window) before getting on the boat might have had something to do with it.

All of a sudden the soca music began to flow like honey.  Nuphoric out of Trinidad was the hype man and he set the tone.  Bags of powder rained down from the sky.  No it was not some weird weather phenomena that Basil Dean neglected to inform us about, (although I wouldn’t be surprised if it was) they were throwing bags of powder off the top of the water truck.  I was lucky enough to get hit in the head and have one explode in my face.  The water truck begin to shower us as well.  As we sailed around the harbour, one thing was vitally clear.  This wasn’t just a party, it was an experience.  Strangers suddenly became friends.  Drinks flowed like the Euphrates.  Girls didn’t care who was wining on them, as long as they had someone to wine on.  I felt a tear developing, this was beautiful.  But don’t just take my word for it, have a look for yourself.

(Editorial Note: So happy that the video actually uploaded, it took longer than the McDonald’s staff in Oakes Field.  That’s not a diss.  Perfection takes time.  Also this is the first time I’ve tried making a movie, so don’t expect it to be some Cristopher Nolan masterpiece.)

As the sun set and we made our way back to the harbour, I couldn’t believe how quickly the time had gone.  I refused to believe that it was over.  It couldn’t be!  Denial.  Outrage. Bey we park far bey!  These are all the things I thought immediately following. This may be a bit far fetched, but having partied in Trinidad, Miami, and Ft. Lauderdale in the preceding months and years, this may have been the best party I’ve ever been to in my adult life.  There.  I said it.  Feel free to debate with me in the comments section.  It was the experience of a lifetime.  Next year one thing is for certain, I een’ missing it! (That’s it.  Final plug.  Support your local artists!)



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